Ryan O'Connell

WARNING: Those who don’t remember my past are doomed to repeat it. I’m Prancing As Fast As I Can is a coming of Gay story that takes us from a scared, self-hating kid who spends most of his time under his desk staring at the hunky man on the Doan’s Pills box, to becoming a writer on Will & Grace, helping to make it a little easier for other scared, self-hating kids who might also be hiding and staring at their secret desire. It’s a journey through Olympic mustaches and when Che´r’s name had an accent and losing your virginity to a trucker and chasing Gay bashers in six-inch heels dressed as a drag bunny and a terrible virus and memorials and memorials and memorials and ACTing UP and using the word “lover” and having a fan who’s also a serial killer and Gay penguins and spreading your boyfriends’ ashes with your new boyfriend and Prop 8 and getting to write lines for divas on Ugly Betty and Gay marriage and more stuff like that and in the end ketamine therapy to help it all make sense.

Hilarious and bawdy musings on disability, sex, family, and Hollywood, from Emmy-winning writer and creator of the Netflix series Special. For years, Ryan O'Connell wished he was different. Raised in a small Southern California beach town described as "Laguna Beach with meth," his dad had taken off for greener pastures, and his alcoholic mom packed him lunches that wouldn't win any Top Chef: Quickfire challenges. On top of it, he had to be disabled and gay? Luckily, Ryan always had a love for writing. There, he could "construct the narrative of my life before anyone can construct it for me." In essays that range from the poignant to the side-splitting, Ryan takes us along as he grapples with addiction, navigates the early days of writing for online media in NYC, and uses his voice to gain entrance into the cutthroat world of Hollywood, where he becomes a sought-after writer and creator. In other essays he asks the very important question: "Are Straight People Okay?" (short answer is no), explores the battle between your IRL vs URL identity, and ruminates on the healing power of being gay and on vacation. Finally, Ryan opens up his committed relationship and becomes a slut for the first time, keeping a diary of his sexual misadventures, and bravely healing his soul through his hole. In the tradition of writers like Samantha Irby and David Sedaris, INSPIRATION PORN is a candid and often raunchy look at a life lived without apologies.

From the star of Peacock's Queer as Folk and the Netflix series Special comes a "funny, tender, and beautiful" (Gary Janetti, New York Times bestselling author) novel following a gay TV writer with cerebral palsy as he fights addiction and searches for acceptance in an overwhelmingly ableist world. Elliott appears to be living the dream as a successful TV writer with a doting boyfriend. But behind his Instagram filter of a life, he's grappling with an intensifying alcohol addiction, he can't seem to stop cheating on his boyfriend with various sex workers, and his cerebral palsy is making him feel like gay Shrek. After falling down a rabbit hole of sex, drinking, and Hollywood backstabbing, Elliott decides to limp his way towards redemption. But facing your demons is easier said than done. "With his singular voice and unforgettable wit" (Steven Rowley, author of The Guncle), Ryan O'Connell presents a candid, biting, and refreshingly real commentary on gay life, laugh-out-loud exploration of self, and a rare insight into life as a person with disabilities.

The hilarious and incisive debut novel from Ryan O'Connell, the award-winning writer and star of Netflix's Special

'Sharp, bawdy, yet still deeply touching. It's shockingly elegant, and elegantly shocking' LENA DUNHAM'A very funny novel about falling for a fantasy and finding love for one's own self' MELISSA BRODER, author of The Pisces'Funny, horny, heartbreaking' CAROLINE O'DONOGHUE, author of Promising Young Women____________________Eliott is a TV writer with a perfect-penised boyfriend. He's living the dream. But behind the glossy veneer he's been papering over cracks, and they're starting to show. He's creatively stifled, he's drinking a little too often and his cerebral palsy makes him feel like gay Shrek. When River walks in, Elliott's life is turned upside down in the best way. River is funny, charming and makes him feel seen. But maybe that's part of the deal when you hire a sex worker. Eliott is lost and he needs someone, anyone, to point him in the right direction. After all, it's a long limp towards redemption. A hilarious, sexy, ground-breaking debut novel about the intersection of queerness and disability, and discovering who you really are.____________________What readers are saying about Just By Looking at Him'Darkly funny and poignant''Such a fresh take . . . I was gripped from the first page''Brutally honest, funny and poignant look at modern life through the lens of disability''This book is honest, hilarious, and raw . . . I loved literally every character''The author has such a strong voice and has created in Eliot a character that I will not soon forget . . . I found myself laughing out loud''Reads like your favorite whip- smart sitcom everyone looks forward to at the end of the day''One of the funniest books I have ever read'

From the star of Peacock's Queer as Folk and the Netflix series Special comes a darkly witty and touching novel following a gay TV writer with cerebral palsy as he fights addiction and searches for acceptance in an overwhelmingly ableist world. Eliot appears to be living the dream as a successful TV writer with a doting boyfriend. But behind his Instagram filter of a life, he's grappling with an intensifying alcohol addiction, he can't seem to stop cheating on his boyfriend with various sex workers, and his cerebral palsy is making him feel like gay Shrek. After falling down a rabbit hole of sex, drinking, and Hollywood backstabbing, Eliot decides to limp his way towards redemption. But facing your demons is easier said than done. Candid, biting, and refreshingly real, Just by Looking at Him is an incisive commentary on gay life, a heart-centered, laugh-out-loud exploration of self, and a rare insight into life as a person with disabilities.

Ryan O'Connell is a gay dude with lots of feelings and, for your sake, has written about most of them. This is a collection of his best essays about various things like getting older, living in New York City, and dealing with the worst hangovers. Get ready to laugh, learn and come to terms with being a twenty-something.